Suck It, Superman
by RationalCashew
Summary: Written for the X-Files valentine's Exchange (2019). Very early relationship. Season 7. Their relationship is new. Things are going great. And, then, Mulder realizes that it's Valentine's Day and he's planned absolutely nothing. Rated T because I probably threw in some language.


He should cancel.

It was too soon to assume they were anything at this point, anyway. Right?

Did they kiss on New Year's Eve? Yes.

Did he regret it? Not even a little.

Had he been cognizant of the fact that Valentine's Day was only a few short – _very short – _weeks away? No. No, he had not.

That was his own fault.

Mulder placed his arms over the file on his desk and laid his head down with a groan. How was he supposed to know that Valentine's Day was going to fall on movie night? Okay. He could've looked ahead at the calendar but, he hadn't thought about it at the time. Or, any time in the last seven weeks.

Did she even _want _to do anything? Was it presumptuous or sexist if he assumed that she did?

He heaved a sigh and checked his watch and dropped his head again. Scully would be waltzing into the basement office in exactly thirty-seven minutes.

Another thought struck, causing him to lift his head. Maybe, they could take an out of town case. They'd both be too preoccupied and – no. That would be bad. That would be very bad. Even _he _could recognize that impending disaster.

God, where was that horde of zombies when he needed them?

The fact was that Mulder hadn't taken Valentine's Day into consideration for years. Now that he had a… well, he didn't know what to call her… he was panicking.

Mulder was man enough to admit that.

Mostly. He was _mostly _man enough to admit that.

Before he knew it, Scully was entering the office with a smile on her face and a coffee in each hand.

"Morning," she greeted, holding out one of the to-go cups to him, and then frowned. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he replied and feigned a smile. Scully shot him a look laced with a certain skepticism but said nothing as she shrugged off her coat. After a moment, she sat in her chair – the one across from his desk because God-forbid he get around to actually getting her one.

Oh. That could be a good present.

No, he mused, she'd know. That would be trying too hard.

God, why was this so _difficult_? It was Scully. His beautiful, enigmatic, intelligent partner; the very same one that he'd loved for years and finally managed to trick into falling for him, too.

That's what it had to be. He'd somehow tricked her into it. It was the only logical explanation for why she was with him.

He was an ass.

He was an ass and he wanted to cancel rather than screw this up or admit that he'd forgotten.

"Okay, Mulder," Scully said with a frown. "What gives?"

"Huh?" He looked up to find her staring at him blankly. "What?"

Scully rolled her eyes and tossed the file back on the desk; the file he hadn't realized that she'd picked up in the first place.

"What?" Mulder asked again.

"What is going on with you?" Scully asked, slowly as though he were a small child.

"Nothing," he said. "I… didn't really sleep last night."

It wasn't a total lie. He _didn't _sleep last night. It wasn't for lack of trying, either. It had hit him last night that today was Valentine's Day and he'd spent the night doing the same thing he'd spent the entire morning doing: torturing himself.

Concern shot through him when she stood from the chair and began to head to the door. Wow. He didn't even have a chance to screw it up before she was walking.

"Scully?"

She turned around, looking at him like she was waiting for him to say something. Mulder found it oddly disconcerting. He must have made a face because she chuckled.

"I'm helping with autopsies today. Remember? We talked about it yesterday?"

Right. They did talk about it yesterday. He'd forgotten that, too.

"I remember," he lied. She knew he was lying because she only shook her head and gave him that smirk of hers that said she knew.

Once again, she started to walk out the door and he stopped her.

"You're still coming over, right?" he blurted. What was _wrong _with him? Having her away all day should have given him time to figure something out.

"Yes," she replied pleasantly, slipping back into her coat and grabbing her purse. Mulder suddenly realized that she'd been in the office longer than he thought she had. "It'll probably be closer to eight or nine, though."

Perfect, he mused silently. That bought him some time.

"Just call me when you're on your way."

She flashed him a smile and left him alone with his plotting.

He was screwed.

* * *

Deciding how to perfect Valentine's Day for the world's most mostly-unreadable-woman was ridiculously harder than Mulder had anticipated. Even with her off at Quantico all day. He could read her like a book in all but couple of types of situations. Why did this have to be one of them?

He should cancel. He should call her and tell her that he wasn't really feeling well and – no, she'd show up even faster. And, not even in not-girlfriend-but-definitely-girlfriend mode, either. She'd show up in Doctor Scully mode.

Then, she'd realize he was an ass and dump him.

An unproductive call to the Gunmen for advice reminded him that he really needed to find new friends. Frohike, of all people, had viciously reprimanded his carelessness and reminded him that Scully was too good for him, anyway – as though Mulder weren't completely aware of that already. Byers had advised a romantic meal, provided that he was lucky enough to find a place with a cancelation. He didn't even understand what Langley's suggestion had been but Mulder had the feeling he'd been talking about something drug-related and Superman and had stopped listening almost immediately.

He could ask Skinner but then he'd risk getting her in trouble and he wasn't about to do that. Not to mention, it was kind of weird to ask that of his boss. Even for "Spooky" Mulder.

He could call his mother, but she wasn't quite the warmest person in the world. Not to mention, a "hey, Mom, I know we haven't talked in a while but can you help me with the Valentine's Day I screwed up for my partner and need to fix before she realizes I screwed it up?" phone call would most likely just result in a "Fox, you're a grown man" response and possibly some other mention of his failings.

The only person he could think of calling that would not only go all out in helping him, but do so happily, was Scully's mom. Mulder started to dial Maggie Scully – precious, precious Maggie Scully – when he realized that he wasn't sure if Scully had told her mom about them. He was well aware of Mrs. Scully's jabs over the years regarding the nature of the relationship he shared with her daughter and he knew how much it annoyed Scully. He'd never minded it - at least, Mrs. Scully took an interest in her kids' lives - but the last thing he wanted to do was drag the amazing Mrs. Scully into something they hadn't defined, yet.

His Scully would _definitely _murder him for that.

Mulder put his phone back in his pocket with a sigh.

Finally, his commiserating paid off and he got an idea.

* * *

Mulder checked his watch. Scully was due to be at his apartment in twenty minutes. Which, he knew, really meant ten – fifteen if traffic was bad. No one was more prompt than Special Agent Dana Scully. While he'd always chalked that up to her being a military brat, sometimes that strict behavioral pattern was a reliable comfort. Times like this one.

He glanced around his apartment, giving it one last once over.

Candy: _check_.

Wine: _check_.

Flowers: _check_.

Movies – two because he hadn't been able to decide on one: _check_.

Pizza: _on the way_. So, check.

He exhaled a breath. Scully had been there a million times over the years and spent even more time there since they'd officially become romantically involved. He needed to chill out.

But, this was different. Regular movie night was one thing. But, I-screwed-up-and-forgot-Valentine's-Day movie night had to be perfect. Or, at least, look like he didn't totally forget.

A knock at the door pulled him from his reverie and his heart thudded in his chest. Okay. Show time.

Mulder opened the door to find the pizza boy instead of Scully. He wasn't sure if he was happy for the extra couple of minutes or if he would have rather gotten it over with. Regardless, he paid the kid and brought the pizza into the living room, leaving the box closed on the coffee table.

He'd barely looked up when smaller knock on the door – the Scully knock, because she always knocked the same way – sounded. He grinned.

Now, it really was show time.

The trek to the door seemed to last a lifetime. He'd gone through a million buzzing thoughts from the coffee table to the door. Including, but not limited to: the night was already ruined and she was going to dump him before they really had a chance to see what happened with this thing; his shirt was terrible and he should've changed it; if she dumped him, would she still work with him? No, if she dumped him, she'd ask for a transfer.

He exhaled a heavy, nervous breath and mentally told himself that he was not seventeen anymore, but a man and he needed to act like it. Not to mention, this time, they weren't spending the holiday on a stakeout or anything.

But, she made him nervous. She always did. Her smile warmed him. Her laugh set off fireworks in his brain. No one could break his concentration or break his understanding in the way that she could.

That was that. She had him wrapped around her finger, he resigned silently to himself. And, he was totally okay with it. That was the scary part.

"Mulder?" her muffled voice asked from the other side of the door, causing him to realize he'd been having his internal crisis a little too long. He opened the door, holding up the flowers that had been sitting on the counter – the very same flowers he didn't remember grabbing on his way to the door. Scully smiled and said, "Muuuuulder," in that tone he liked, the one where he knew she was happy and appreciated the gesture but was also slightly embarrassed because she was uncomfortable being the center of attention. "Thank you," she said, smiling up at him.

He smiled back and kissed her cheek before ushering her into his apartment.

Maybe, this night wouldn't be a complete failure after all.

"The pizza got here right before you did. You probably passed the delivery boy in the hall. It's on the coffee table. Let me grab the wine."

"Wine?" she asked, sounding somewhat impressed. He shrugged, unable to hide his self-satisfied grin.

Oh, yeah. Superman had nothing on him.

* * *

Scully followed Mulder's instruction, guided mostly by her stomach. She hadn't eaten anything in almost eight hours.

"I grabbed two movies," Mulder called from the kitchen. "I wasn't sure what you'd be in the mood for."

"What'd you get?" She asked as she opened the pizza box. Scully stifled a laugh. The pizza was cut into the shape of heart. On the inside of the box was written _You have a pizza my heart_. Not even Mulder would make a pun that terrible.

"Something funny and something… sappy," he replied, entering the living room with the bottle of wine and two glasses that she didn't know he owned. He frowned when he saw her. "What?"

She looked up, losing the battle with her laughter. He gave her another confused look before sitting beside her and setting the glasses on the coffee table. It didn't take him long at all to notice the contents of the pizza box. Mulder looked to her, paling slightly with a look of panic in his eyes.

"I didn't… that was-that was not me," he babbled, causing her to laugh.

"I didn't think it was," she replied, still chuckling.

Mulder visibly relaxed a little and chuckled. "A pizza pun is a little too cheesy. Even for me," he said.

Scully shot him an amused look and laughed, causing him to realize that he'd just made a pizza pun.

"Okay," he laughed, "that was not intentional."

She nodded, not quite believing him. He held up a bottle of wine.

"Yes! Please," she said. After a day on her feet, cutting up bodies, wine and pizza sounded perfect. In fact, she'd been hoping that he'd forget about Valentine's Day so she could have a relaxing evening. He never ceased to surprise her, though. That was for sure.

* * *

Mulder glanced down at Scully, cuddled into him and only half-watching the movie. She looked so innocent with the way she was trying to stay awake. He couldn't help but to grin.

Despite how new this thing between them was, moments like this felt so normal. It felt like they'd been together for years. In way, he admitted to himself, they had. For as slow as things were going romantically – or, so it felt like – he was happy with where they were at.

If he had realized that earlier in the day, things would've have gone far more smoothly and he wouldn't have considered, no matter how briefly, taking on a case to get out of the evening.

The truth was that Scully wasn't really a pomp and circumstance kind of woman. She'd never expressed any kind of inherent need for him to have candles and flowers and chocolate and wine and a fancy romantic dinner. Although, he was sure the flowers, chocolate, and wine certainly had helped his cause.

He looked back to the screen. Leave it to Scully to choose the comedy instead of the sappy movie – especially, on Valentine's Day. That was just another thing about her to add to the list of reasons why she was perfect.

"Hey, Scully?" he asked quietly.

"Mm?" she replied sleepily. It made him grin.

"Did I do okay?"

Scully lifted her head and gave him a smile. "It's perfect, Mulder."

He couldn't help but to grin as she cuddled back into him. Mulder pressed a kiss to her forehead and returned his gaze to the movie.

_Suck it, Superman_, he thought to himself.


End file.
